Better Days

Some of the pictures I've taken while on a trip to the Kansai Region (Kyoto, Nara, Osaka, Kobe) and Hiroshima

While I was reviewing these pictures I was trying to relive everything in my head. Were they even real? AH, the better days!

Aqueduct at Nanzenji Temple

Kinkakuji Temple

Temple at Miyajima

Deer and crow at Nara

First few sakura at Arashiyama

Kobe Harbour

At the Hiroshima Peace Memorial

View from Kiyomizudera

Ganbaro, Nihon!

Hi.

Life has been more of a tornado than a whirlwind lately. I never thought I would write my thoughts about how I want to remember my time in Japan in the context of forced evacuations, earthquakes and nuke radiation.

I never experienced the tsunami first-hand, but the earthquake, I did. We just got back from a week-long Kansai-Hiroshima trip. 2:46 PM, March 11th, I was on an afternoon nap on the second level of a double-deck bed.

The earth started shaking.

The safest refuge I found was under a sturdy desk. At that moment all I knew was that that earthquake right there was different. It was unusually strong, and it lasted longer than usual. I just had not realized that it would come down to history as the 5th strongest recorded one.

Circumstance merely availed me a chance to leave in a rush, to hop on a train Osaka-bound, able to pack clothes only good for 3-4 days.

Those days were difficult cause everything was uncertain. Even where we would sleep for the night was unsure. But then there were kind hands that extended their help to us, and for that alone there's nothing to be but thankful.

Leaving Japan was supposed to be a BRB rather than a GTG, and that's the reason why my regrets are summed up to this: I should have made the most heartfelt and proper goodbyes to the new friends I've made, or the places I loved. I should have done all my living alone routines just one last time before I left. I got so accustomed to them that even today I keep imagining going biking to the grocery just to fetch some soy sauce.

If I were still there today I would have sat under a sakura tree this afternoon, enjoying hanami just like I played it out in my head a month ago. That was a plan that had not happened (just like Disneyland)! But I will be there, sitting under a sakura tree, in one of the next few cherry blossom seasons. It is only a question of when exactly.

As I do some goodbye-ing (to my school, to some friends, to my dorm room) thru the Internet, I can't help but think how to not fully close the chapter on Japan, because I know someday, somehow, I will be back.

There are some really nice things like lessons, omiyage, or otherwise I brought home with me though. Days in Kyoto, dinners eating karaage, afternoons biking, dawns in airports-- some of the best things I've had in life.

I can say that before I left for Japan I was the most undeserving exchange student. I barely had any affiliation with Japan, and I just wanted to go because I was forever mesmerized of pictures of Tokyo's city lights. Living there for 6 months however, has made me more Japanese than I could have expected to be.

Ganbaro Nihon! You are the Japanese who built the most complex railway system in the world. You are Japanese who invented the most useful forms of technology for humankind. You will be the same Japanese who will rise above what is now!

And thank you Japan & the Japanese government, really. A 6-month scholarship to Japan was one of the best opportunities I had in my life. I have nothing but good words to say about your country and your people.

I am still waiting for that night I will dream of Japan in my sleep. As I replay walking the streets of Shinjuku in my head, all will be well.

Danne

Feeling Nostalgic

Have you had a blog since you were 12? And have you felt like you've written silly things? If yes and yes, then we sure feel the same.

My blog was there when the night was too quiet and I had something to say. A blinking text cursor was always ready to be thrown emotions, whether on ordinary days or when I had the biggest heartache. We're that tight. ;)

So I decided to revisit my now deceased and embarrassing blogs and skim through the silliest and most childish pieces of prose ever written in the history of the blogosphere, because hey, even if it's already 3 AM, the night is young and I need a good laugh.

Well, I think though, a lot of things remain the same. Most of my sentiments when I was younger echo to the present. I've never really been so sure about my thoughts until heard my younger self say it back to me again. It seems like things never really change, eh? You just grow to a more updated, and hopefully better version of yourself.

And lastly, it's funny how things start falling into place. Before, I only wrote about it. Some things in our lives are there for no apparent purpose--until you get back, read your diary and realize they were preparations for better things ahead.

We have plans but He has bigger, grander schemes.

Written February 19, 2008

I'd definitely choose the commotion of the city. There is something about hearing people around you talk, seeing lights flash here and there, or hearing beeps of mobile phones every once in a while, having so much people around that you need to squeeze yourself in, in order to pass. Being surrounded by laughs, tolling bells, and lots of lights was just perfect. The noise, knowing that there are thousands of stories happening in the midst, makes the world around me feel even more alive.

Written January 22, 2009

Tokyo. I've never been to Tokyo in real life, and neither have I in my dreams. It is one city I dream of going to just because it is depicted to be ever-so dynamic and alive. Bright city lights at night really appeal to me. I’m an urban person, I want a fast-paced life, and that is most probably why Tokyo is the city for me. The picture above resembles Times Square a lot, except that that one’s more Asian, and that’s why I like it better.

Written February 10, 2009

11. I worry a lot, I make to-do lists which never end. I'm a work-aholic, when there's nothing to do, I still find something I'm supposed do. I don't believe in idle time and I find it hard to sit down, relax and chill.

17. I admire people who are good in three things: keeping secrets, living one day at a time... and Math!

Written April 15, 2009

I've been fascinated with the Japanese culture since forever, and it's so nice to get a chance to learn a bit about their language this summer. It's quite hard you see. I tried memorizing the Katakana characters last night (and crammed it also today). It's good that I sort of prepared because we had a recitation test on the 2nd day of classes. Eek. After two days in Hapon 10 class, today I got my Japanese name! It goes something like ﾘﾝ デイﾝ ﾏビゲイル. HAI! :)

Written May 7, 2009

I don't know why the rain makes me happy, perhaps I've associated it with a happy instance once upon a time. The rain slows down everything. Do you notice how slowly people move on days like today? Rain makes us take things a little lightly. Rain gives us a chance to stay in traffic and sleep. Rain gives us an excuse to stay together in umbrellas.

Sucky

That moment in the morning when you first regain consciousness, you begin looking for something to think about, right? And one of the thoughts you first search is an idea of what happened last night.

Today I woke up in a trance, curled up on the second floor of this double deck-desk with the heater on and two layers of blankets over me. And I remember, last night I had a terrible tummy ache, it wasn't really supposed to be forgettable. The feeling sucked, really. I had to throw up just to get the bad feeling away, but it felt just the same. The worst part was cleaning up when I just wanted to lie in bed and feel numb. Ah, the perks of living alone. Never felt so helpless.

Thoughts like food poison came into my head, and then I started to consider, have I eaten anything with bugs recently? Haha. It was really funny how I even thought about going home. It dawned on me that it would take four hours to fly back to Manila, and taking Mefenamic Acid would be a better option.

So in the end, before I finally slept, while in the middle of the suckiest feeling in the world, my sleeping roommate woke up and said to me:

"If you would want me to take you to the hospital, just tell me, okay?"

Then, she went back to sleep.

Right there and then I realized, there's a way the universe surrounds you with people who care.

Sprinkles

Made chocolate for the first time!

Days In Japan

Shots from my first 5 months here. Hope you like it! :)

February Air

I dreamt I was a camera, and I walked along sidewalks and shorelines, jumped over treetops and flew onto clouds and snapped away. It was grand, for my only purpose was to freeze time and remember what was beautiful.

Strangers

All of us in this world were once strangers to each other. Minus one letter and the word becomes 'strange', which means weird, unusual, queer. World population articles say that every second at least 3 children are born. So the world becomes three children more estranged, distant to each human being every time the clock ticks. We can't even keep up with that if we make an average of one, two or three new friends a week.

Try walking on the street, or riding on the train, or eating in a restaurant. We're all surrounded by strangers whose faces are generic for us to even remember. Everybody is busy living their own lives, thinking his opinion matters. Each person has dreams and has some family to go home to. Each person misses somebody, each person regrets something. Each person thinks of something at that instant.

Have you wondered how it would sound like if everybody thought out loud?

And, isn't it a also a wonder how we recognize the faces of people we know? We have a pair of eyes, a nose, a mouth, teeth and ears. Add to that some ornamental facial features like moles, eyelashes, and wrinkles. It's amazing how many permutations and combinations of those structures make us people barely look alike. I'm also impressed by a human's face recognition mechanism. It's just plain awesome!

In Alphabetical Order

So here's the list! A summary of things I want to do in the many more remaining years of my life, scribbled down my notebook while on the subway, in the library, in class daydreaming. Most of them are really pointless haha.

Draw on the wall.

Eat something moving.

Find the North Star.

Fold paper cranes.

Go fishing.

Laugh so hard I can't breathe.

Lie on the grass and listen to "Yellow". At night!

Make a perfect sunny-side up.

Own a lucky charm.

Ring someone's door bell and run.

Run over train tracks.

Skateboard.

Send a message in a bottle.

Shout.

Surprise someone.

Take a picture of a peacock.

Talk to my music soulmate.

Teach someone something.

Touch fire.

Work in advertising.

Write a will.

Weigh over 100 pounds.

Talk

Haha. It's not that I'm lazy to blog but these guys really said it perfectly. My song of the moment!

Talk by Coldplay

Oh brother I can't, I can't get through
I've been trying hard to reach you, cause I don't know what to do
Oh brother I can't believe it's true
I'm so scared about the future and I wanna talk to you
Oh I wanna talk to you
You can take a picture of something you see
In the future where will I be?
You can climb a ladder up to the sun
Or write a song nobody has sung
Or do something that's never been done

Are you lost or incomplete?
Do you feel like a puzzle, you can't find your missing piece?
Tell me, how do you feel?
Well I feel like they're talking in a language I don't speak
And they're talking it to me

So you take a picture of something you see
In the future where will I be?
You can climb a ladder up to the sun
Or a write a song nobody has sung
Or do something that's never been done
Do something that's never been done

So you don't know were you're going, and you wanna talk
And you feel like you're going where you've been before
You tell anyone who'll listen but you feel ignored
Nothing's really making any sense at all
Let's talk
Let's talk